Hallelujah

The last 3 years of my life are best described by Leonard Cohen’s song Hallelujah: Your faith was strong but you needed proof You saw her bathing on the roof Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you She tied you to her kitchen chair She broke your throne and she cut your hair And from … [Read more…]

Leaving, But Not For Good

Sometimes you have to knock down everything you’ve created and start from scratch Fourth night in a row sleeping in separate rooms. Longest we’ve done that. Tonight is the hardest. Nora cried because “everything is changing.” I start a new job tomorrow and am going to look at a room for rent in an all-women’s … [Read more…]

A Time for Monogamy

As I’ve said in the past, polyamory is for the privileged. In a world that values economic productivity over personal growth and relationships, most of us are programmed to spend more time keeping up with the Joneses than we are connecting with our loved ones. At the end of a long day or week of … [Read more…]

Feeling Like a Failure

I had such a good thing going with Brad. The last three weeks were the best of our almost-7-year relationship. We’d never been more intimate or gotten along so well. Wanting to further heal our relationship – that had recently come so close to ending – I volunteered to be monogamous until we felt solid … [Read more…]

Processing and Staying Strong

I’m so angry right now. I want to break things and then run away. I want to hurt him. I want to punish him. Ok, the anger is dissipating. I already feel better, just typing that out. Our friend, who is a therapist, was just here trying to facilitate an NVC conversation between us that … [Read more…]